I can't believe I am actually starting this. I had all of these super compelling things to say, and now that I'm actually sitting down to write, I have nothing. There is so much on my heart that I want to share with you all so I will just start with the photo at the top of this page....
I LOVE dried roses, well any flower, but roses are my favorite to dry and keep. Behind the dried flowers is my map of the world. I love this photo because it captures so much of who I am. I am young, but not super young. I am adventurous, but I love tradition. I love finding the beauty in that which is past or used or, in this case, dried up. The roses represent my past. Parts of it were beautiful in its time, but parts of it cut like the thorns on the stems. I have had my moments of great joy and my moments of great regret, but all of it combined has lead to a well worn flower that is still so beautiful today. Today, my past may look dried up to some, but to me it is what made me who I am and though the thorns can still be seem, they don't cut like they once did. The map represents my future and my heart for all people. This particular map is a scratch off map! I love it because it not only shows me all the countries I've been to, but it also shows me how much more of the world there is to see! I get so excited when I look at this map. There is so much beauty, love, and creation to see and I can't wait to head out and start exploring.
As I move beyond the image illustrations, I begin to dig deeper into myself. I stated above that parts of my past have left scars. For so long, I have kept these scars a secret thinking they made me look weak, or wrong, or full of guilt and shame, but the older I become the more I see these scars as wounds that molded me into the woman I am today. I hear all the time, "Just be YOU!"... but if you don't even know who YOU is, how are you supposed to be it. I have grown up believing I had to fit a certain mold. I was taught to say the right things and always behave in a proper manner. And while these are not bad things to be taught, I never allowed myself to fully spread my wings. I wanted to experience my own journey and wether I flew or I fell, I wanted to at least try. When I finally did spread my wings for the first time, I fell hard. So hard that I was afraid to fly again. Several years would go by before I would spread my wings again, but this time I would actually soar for a short time. I didn't crash after this attempt; it was more of a calm landing. My time soaring through the air taught me that I can be my own person. I can listen to my own heart and decide what is best for me. I learned that I can be me. Truly me. Me, without letting anyone tell me I was right or I was wrong.
My time flying gave me courage I didn't know I had. It gave me joy like I'd never experienced. It showed me truly how I want to live the rest of my life. But as I sit here, back on the ground, preparing for another take off, I am reminded of how precious life is. That those amazing times of soaring through the sky will only happen if we choose to live fearlessly and love without limits. I can't wait to see where I head when I take off once again. I can't wait to see all I learn from this next flight. But until then, I will wait patiently on the ground and prepare myself for another grand adventure.
I hope you will wait with me so that when I do take off, you will be able to soar along with me through this journey called life!
Your Fearless Wanderer